Keeping Your PINK Slip

Elegance does not consist of putting on a new dress..'He'll never respect you as being able to hold your own unless you can stand on your own two feet financially'.A gurl don't have to be rich, just have to maintain the ability to take care of herself..Because a man wants a strong woman, not a HELPLESS kid..Sexually, this will impact the float in his boat..I had my eyes on this principle-In a relationship of any kind, if one person feels the other person isn't bringing anything to the table, he or she will begin to disrespect that person..There is one simple story in this book where Michelle was living with a man for four years..For most of that tume, he paid everything because she didn't have any money.Then she inherited some money.He asked her to help pay some bills,she declined.He didn't asked her to carry all the weight or even half of it..He merely asked her to pitch in.Still Michelle insisted that the money for her retirement. Shortly thereafter, he 'retired' from the relationship-at which point she moved out..She was then forced to pay several times the amount of money for her own living expenses..I know how exactly you feel when you have to bring the food on the table whereas the other just know how to clean it up..and I am not blaming you for your retirement..I should know that no matter how pretty a woman is, looks alone will not sustain a man respect.Appearance may pull you in, but it is herself independence that will keep him turned on..to conclude this..The bitchier woman would never let a man think that she's there because she has 'nowhere else to go'..But she is there because she want to stay with him...not to burden him..as she can stand on her own two feet..I do respect you decision and I really wanna be with you because I'm a woman whe needs a guide from a man like you to guard me..hide me..and keep me besides you..No matter how strong I am, I still need my Imam to be my master..and insyaAllah..I know I cant make you love me, but I can love you as we go on..day by day..ups and down..p/s: I am sorry for being late...

Don'Give Up..Just Keep A Good Heart

Life is not all about Pleasing others. I know sometimes being such a nice person wont changed other to treat us the same but Don't GIVE UP...No matter how they responsed towards us, just keep doing the same thing..Because I do believe, a very strong stone do brokwn away with a water.. But sometimes I am so tired and so damn exhausted because I never showed them what exactly I felt about this..I keep on smiling whenever in front of anyone...because why should I told them my story when they can only listen but cannot understand..heartless...and what is the most painfull, when the only person who can understand it cant make himself to listen..Sometimes I just need him to hold my hand and say that I am not ok thus he  turns up for me...yet he couldn't do that as we were on different planet..but there it goes again, DONT GIVE UP BEING A GOOD HEART..so here I am to forgive..not because you were doing something wrong as you never did it..instead you are the most wise man I ever met..but I forgive you because being nice to me all this while..I forgive you for keeping me secretly beside you where you cant tell anybody just to make sure I dont lose you..Hiding so many things from me just to avoid my heart wound eventhough u knew how strong my heart could be..Nevertheless u do the things that might really hurt me so much when I know it later, I wont put a grundge in me towards you..perhaps and for sure I would be graceful..Because I wont give up being a good heart as it already be part of me..I dont have to worry if the world put me down to earth..I should know thats the life cycles never stop till the heart no more beating..And I know I should never also holding my heart from Loving him because he is my present from Allah..Syukur Alhamdulillah...I feel better when he used to say 'Ekin, I know you're not ok'...Thank you so much...p/s: Love of the Lifetime

"You Always Know What To Say"

Alhamdulillah..I am still here..Its been a while since my last story. I dont know where to start or how to begin this time.. But I know that it would be some kind of answer to someone special from Allah to me.. From the first time I met you, I really cant take my eyes on you..I dont know why it happened because the moment I saw you, the first thing came across my mind is that really you or it was just a dream??? Yet it is true. I feel so grateful everyday till today. As we go on, we discussing about so many topics, share our stories, laughing and crying.... You were listening to me eventhough It just a snack..You understand me in my confused..You speak with me in your silence..You see me in you blinded eyes...You are so different and that is what I am looking for all this while... My dear, the moon are so beautiful but actually the sun gave his light to him..Day are too hot because of the heat..Birds are singging around...Cats and dogs chasing and playing.. Winter summer autumn and spring keeps on changing yearly..Same goes to me..I had my routine life style before..I never thought that I would meet someone and allowed him to be in my heart..my dream..my mind..and of course in my life... But, do I also in his heart, I dont know..Does he love me..Only Allah know..Is he want to be with me, Only he knows..all I know, I just want to be his 'makmum' and he is my 'imam'...The road would never be a straight one..I should know that Allah wont let me pass the way without testing my iman, my patient and my love...So he set up for me with a great task and I admit I almost fall..I am not strong enough ...I keep telling myself..its ok..I will be fine..Its just part of my life..No need to worry..Yet its not an easy to handle...If there is no tomorrow for me, Would you like to spend your time today with me? "I dont wanna leave my wife alone once I am not in this world anymore"...So please do let me be by your side till death do us apart...I promise I wont cry and I promise I will keep my life goes on because I know you always alive in my heart...Yeahhhhh you should the thruth..sometimes I might be crying..even now..Because I have been waiting for you so long ago..and when I know the fact..its really breaking my heart into a pieces..All in all, I wont give up on us..and together with this..I just wanna to say THANK YOU for being in my heart..teaching me..understanding me..keep your patient upon me..I know a lot of ups and downs after this..but nevermind..I wont let you face it alone..I might not be the one who solves all your problems..but I promise you dont have to face it alone.. P/s: Kumbang yang dinanti telah menghidupkan kembali taman bunga yang sudah lama mati..Terima Kasih...

Sometimes When I push U away because I want you to pull me Closer

Sometimes when a woman cried so hard its only because she love and cares for that person so much. She refuse to admit that she need to be hug because she was so afraid if the guy would dumb her for another woman. At last she just asking for a brrak up. Later on, she will regretted it but to take back her words, that would not be..Because she know that she also has her own dignity..and she must give herself a Self- Respect..After a while, she thought why are men so stupid? Why her man did not hug her thoroughly during that time. Why he just walk away and never turning back..If he could understand that..when she ask a break up, that mean she want him to put her in hus arm and say that she is the only person that he ever wanted. After all, he is the only guy that she ever dreaming of.. P/s: I really want to be by your side as long as I can..Till the end of my Life..

Nice vs Bitch

I used to be a nice as I can but at the end its hurting me...Its really hurt...how I'm gonna laugh in front of them if there is always have a scissor inside my heart...I have being a bith before and I tell u what its really awesome...I have a great life, my friends all with me...with a great job...so many guys chasing me and I feel like a heaven...
I just love myself and everything I do ist only about me and me and me...Now, its change when I met you..I dont know now...I dont know how...

Sick and Tired!!!

It seems so easy when we just said it rather than do it...i cant change my life now even i want to, and the question is why???? I have try to pull him out of my minds but when the times pass by, I still have that those feelings...sometimes I will text him eventhought I know that he wont replied me, but I never give up...and I really hate it..... I wanna be a good friend with him just like we were before but everythings wont be the same because I knew someday I might be pushing him to accept me back and it might broken our relationships even worst...I dont wanna lose him, or I already had??? thinking about it make me sick and so damn exhausted!!! he so awesome but his not mine...i might not in his heart but he always in my mind...he dont need me anymore, but I want to be with him, to love and to be loved by him...and even I tried to find someone else, at the end I will turn on him again and again and again...really makes me feel tired...arghhhhhhh...why dont you understand that I love you so much...why we were in this type of situation...wanting you will breaking their feelings, and letting you go will put a knife in my heart forever...I feel like I'm dying even I'm breathing...and I'm so tired...so damn tired!!!!

I've never mad at you...and you know its true...

I will not gonna mad at you if you made your move today and say "after this dont ever call and send sms anymore". because you use to said it before. I've heard it for several times. and you keep on comes and goes in my life. and actually not only you doing that towards me, there is someone also where do the same but the different is, he is more gentle than you. Because he did mentioned that we are just friends.
At first we met, u just said that we just be like brother and sister, suddently you just walk away..
Later when you came back you ask me to be your gf, and I agree..but you go again leaving me speechless..
Then a few years later, you came back and want me to be your fiancee and I agree..unfortunately things were not like we have planned..and you were missing again..
And now you come with your new look and ask me to be your wife..and I said, I do...but why you dont reply my messages, didn't pick up my calls..
and you knew that I've never mad at you..
because I'll forgives you no matter what, not because I love you because right now, I dont really know what is 'LOVE'..but I'm just afraid of losing you forever..I MISS YOU...

p/s: the only person that I LOVE is you FIK...yes you...