I've never mad at you...and you know its true...

I will not gonna mad at you if you made your move today and say "after this dont ever call and send sms anymore". because you use to said it before. I've heard it for several times. and you keep on comes and goes in my life. and actually not only you doing that towards me, there is someone also where do the same but the different is, he is more gentle than you. Because he did mentioned that we are just friends.
At first we met, u just said that we just be like brother and sister, suddently you just walk away..
Later when you came back you ask me to be your gf, and I agree..but you go again leaving me speechless..
Then a few years later, you came back and want me to be your fiancee and I agree..unfortunately things were not like we have planned..and you were missing again..
And now you come with your new look and ask me to be your wife..and I said, I do...but why you dont reply my messages, didn't pick up my calls..
and you knew that I've never mad at you..
because I'll forgives you no matter what, not because I love you because right now, I dont really know what is 'LOVE'..but I'm just afraid of losing you forever..I MISS YOU...

p/s: the only person that I LOVE is you FIK...yes you...